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Garry
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Post subject: From another board ...  Posted: Sat Oct 13, 2001 5:02 pm |
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Joined: Sat May 26, 2001 9:59 pm
Posts: 7823
Location: Bad Hersfeld, Germany
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Just got this off another F-Body board ...
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Three guys, a Canadian, Osama bin Ladin and Uncle Sam are out walking together one day. They come across a lantern and a Genie pops out of it.
"I will give each of you each one wish, that's three wishes total," says the Genie.
The Canadian says, "I am a farmer, my dad was a farmer, and my son will also farm. I want the land to be forever fertile in Canada."
With a blink of the Genie's eye, 'POOF' the land in Canada was forever made fertile for farming.
Osama bin Ladin was amazed, so he said, "I want a wall around Afghanistan, so that no infidels, Jews or Americans can come into our precious state."
Again, with a blink of the Genie's eye, 'POOF' there was a huge wall around Afghanistan.
"Uncle Sam" (A former civil engineer), asks, "I'm very curious. Please tell me more about this wall." The Genie explains, "Well, it's about 15,000 feet high, 500 feet thick and completely surrounds the country; nothing can get in or out---virtually impenetrable."
"Uncle Sam" says, "Fill it with water."
_________________
Garry Glendown * '99 Firehawk Convertible
"Horsepower is how fast you hit the wall and torque is how far you take the wall with you."
"Speed doesn't kill - suddenly becoming stationary on the other hand ..."
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JackZ28
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Post subject: Posted: Sat Oct 13, 2001 8:18 pm |
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Joined: Mon May 28, 2001 6:03 pm
Posts: 8686
Location: Houston, TX
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MyCar2
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Post subject: Posted: Sun Oct 14, 2001 9:13 am |
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Joined: Sat May 26, 2001 6:35 pm
Posts: 93
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O my gosh... That is to funny... Here is my favorite.
> CREATIVE JUSTICE - PRICELESS...
> >
> > As for what to do with Osama bin Laden:
> >
> > Killing him will only create a martyr.
> >
> > Holding him prisoner will inspire his comrades to take hostages
>to demand his release.
> >
> > Therefore, the following is suggested:
> >
> > Let the Special Forces, Seals or whomever, covertly capture him,
>fly him to an undisclosed hospital and have surgeons quickly perform a
>complete sex change operation. Then return her to Afghanistan to live
>as
> >a woman under the Taliban .
> > ~~~~~
> > From a high school student....
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guerardsgt
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Post subject: Here is one that's funny that I already put on the board Posted: Sun Oct 14, 2001 9:19 am |
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Joined: Tue May 29, 2001 10:04 am
Posts: 1280
Location: FT Drum Ny
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Q:Why don't taliban's teach driver's education and sex ed in the same day.
A:They don't want to wear the camal out.
Somthing I heard that I thought was funny.
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Garry
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Post subject: Posted: Sun Oct 14, 2001 12:09 pm |
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Joined: Sat May 26, 2001 9:59 pm
Posts: 7823
Location: Bad Hersfeld, Germany
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Quote: >fly him to an undisclosed hospital and have surgeons quickly perform a
>complete sex change operation. Then return her to Afghanistan to live
>as
> >a woman under the Taliban .
That's a good one! 
_________________
Garry Glendown * '99 Firehawk Convertible
"Horsepower is how fast you hit the wall and torque is how far you take the wall with you."
"Speed doesn't kill - suddenly becoming stationary on the other hand ..."
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Dark Angel
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Post subject: Posted: Sun Oct 14, 2001 2:52 pm |
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Joined: Sun Aug 26, 2001 4:51 pm
Posts: 681
Location: RAF Lakenheath, UK
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At a hastily called press conference this morning, Taliban Minister of Emigration, Mohammed Ben Dover warned the United States that if any further military action is taken against Afghanistan, Taliban authorities would not hesitate to cut off America's supply of convenience store managers.
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Dark Angel is ready to rumble!!!! 
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99taws6
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Post subject: Posted: Sun Oct 14, 2001 10:22 pm |
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Joined: Sat May 26, 2001 6:35 pm
Posts: 954
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Quote: At a hastily called press conference this morning, Taliban Minister of Emigration, Mohammed Ben Dover warned the United States that if any further military action is taken against Afghanistan, Taliban authorities would not hesitate to cut off America's supply of convenience store managers.
HAPU (sp) from the simpsons...
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Garry
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Post subject: Posted: Mon Oct 15, 2001 5:10 am |
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Joined: Sat May 26, 2001 9:59 pm
Posts: 7823
Location: Bad Hersfeld, Germany
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Quote: HAPU (sp) from the simpsons...
I think he's from India IIRC ...
_________________
Garry Glendown * '99 Firehawk Convertible
"Horsepower is how fast you hit the wall and torque is how far you take the wall with you."
"Speed doesn't kill - suddenly becoming stationary on the other hand ..."
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JackZ28
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Post subject: Posted: Mon Oct 15, 2001 6:31 am |
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Joined: Mon May 28, 2001 6:03 pm
Posts: 8686
Location: Houston, TX
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99taws6
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Post subject: Posted: Mon Oct 15, 2001 11:26 am |
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Joined: Sat May 26, 2001 6:35 pm
Posts: 954
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Quote: It's Apu, and you guys are too hilarious!!
I should have known the devout Simpson watcher would step in....
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JackZ28
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Post subject: Posted: Mon Oct 15, 2001 11:31 am |
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Joined: Mon May 28, 2001 6:03 pm
Posts: 8686
Location: Houston, TX
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Garry
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Post subject: Posted: Mon Oct 15, 2001 11:40 am |
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Joined: Sat May 26, 2001 9:59 pm
Posts: 7823
Location: Bad Hersfeld, Germany
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Quote: Yeah, but now there's no Sky1, and that was like the only channel we watched!!!   I got the whole last season of Simpsons on VCD ... 3 episodes per CD ... should work on any DVD player or PC ... also, all episodes of Futurama ...
_________________
Garry Glendown * '99 Firehawk Convertible
"Horsepower is how fast you hit the wall and torque is how far you take the wall with you."
"Speed doesn't kill - suddenly becoming stationary on the other hand ..."
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JackZ28
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Post subject: Posted: Mon Oct 15, 2001 9:08 pm |
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Joined: Mon May 28, 2001 6:03 pm
Posts: 8686
Location: Houston, TX
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99taws6
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Post subject: Posted: Mon Oct 15, 2001 9:13 pm |
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Joined: Sat May 26, 2001 6:35 pm
Posts: 954
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Quote: Quote: Yeah, but now there's no Sky1, and that was like the only channel we watched!!! I got the whole last season of Simpsons on VCD ... 3 episodes per CD ... should work on any DVD player or PC ... also, all episodes of Futurama ... Hook a brother up........
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Very nice Garry!! 
